Long Lost Met Again…

Sometimes it is okay to be a little selfish for your own self and for your own better future and if that involves leaving everything that you once loved more than anything then also it’s fine.

long-lost-love

 

It has been said that time is a big healer and with time your every wound heals sooner or later, but some wounds remain fresh in your heart and mind like they just happened a moment ago…

I was walking down that road all over again, the red bricks, gigantic trees , newly blooming flowers, everything looked exactly the same yet it all looked different like it’s for the first time I am visiting this place. That intoxicating scent of pure air was still there yet with time things changed.
The sky appeared to be crystal blue, the roads looked newly built, you can smell the charcoal from it. Birds were chirping, everything was exactly the same in my mind, even the memories were so fresh of you and I standing by the stairs. Your masculine hands encircling my waist, my back against your front, I am giggling over something you said a second ago. It looked all same, so real that I was afraid if I will trace my finger along your face, you will be there but no one was there. In these last six years everything has changed, people here look more sophisticated and neatly dressed. That slum where I had spent my twelve years has now taken a shape of a beautiful building.

“So you are finally here” Said a familiar voice and my whole body went stiff.

I turned around to look into those mesmerizing blue eyes, which were able to hypnotize me every time. When I looked at him I was awestruck by the change of his looks and it only exuded one thing that was money!

I was tongue-tied that very moment, all these years I never thought this place will change like this or particularly him. It’s like I am meeting a whole new person.

I remember when I first saw him. I was six years old then, I had a fight with my mother and in return she slapped me, I was sitting under the tree silently weeping over my cruel fate. Out of nowhere someone tapped me on my shoulder and when I refused to look, that person sat beside me.

“Why are you crying?” He asked softly but by his voice I could judge he was annoyed by my crying and this made angry.

“Please go, I don’t want to talk to anyone” I said calmly but he completely ignored my request and took my hands with which I was covering my face within his small hands.

Don’t be a baby, eat this. Whenever I cry, I eat this. Stop crying now, ” he said, putting an orange color lollipop for which I was crying. That is when I noticed him.

He was taller than me, but his face was small, his clothes were exactly like mine mismatched and at places patches covered the area which was torn off. We both looked emaciated, his hair were disheveled just like mine, but what drawn me towards him was eyes beautiful blue orbs. They are just so rare and the intensity his eyes behold was capable of intimidating anyone. In the beginning I was scared of him too, but as time passed we both became inseparable.

He was my best friend, but everything crumpled right in front of my knees when he said he love me. My priorities were different then. I wanted a better future for myself after all, I never wanted to spend my whole life-like my mother did. I wanted to get educated, but he wasn’t ready to let me go so I did the worst possible thing I could do to him, I insulted him in every possible way and left when all he wanted was me to be With him.

“You look good, ” he said, but with a smirk on his face devoid of any emotion.

“You have changed” I said completely ignoring his remark.

He was wearing a teal color turtle neck T-shirt which was highlighting his blue eyes paired it with Gray color shorts. He was wearing a black slippers, but his whole attire looked elegant. His hair looked short, neatly combed.

“With time people change, so have I, ” he said, looking straight into my eyes.

His words crushed My heart into a million of pieces, I know what I did to him was an arch-enemy would also not do but at that time I had no choice.

“I am sorry, ” I said softly, but didn’t dare to look into his eyes.

What I wanted to do was to run into his arms and hug him as tightly as it was possible for me but I know I have lost that right.

“Why are you here?” He asked me in a raised voice, gritting his teeth.

“For you, ” I said and moved towards him, but all my hopes were shattered when he took a step back.

I stop in between, My eyes full of tears, I was just about to run from there when in a blink of eyes, he with a jerk pulled me towards him and I straight landed in his arms.

“You are so irresponsible, if something would have happened to you I would never forgive myself ever, ” he said and engulfed me in His arms. His hands were on my back and my hands were in his hair.

The sensation of having his arms around me was divine. And knowing he still cares for me was even more heart wrenching.

“Please don’t let me go, ” I said and voice break at the end.

“Even if I want to, I can’t, ” he said, tightening his hands around my waist and I snuggled more into him.

For the past ten years I was waiting for this day to come and when it came everything changed. Not only this place has changed over, but this man whom I respect so much has also changed but in the best possible way…

 

 

A Silenced Voice…

FontCandy (5)

 

I dreamed to be a better person,

I dreamed of living in a spick and span area,

I wanted to roam in the city all night without meeting the hungry gaze of men,

Who were all ready to entrap woman like me,

I dreamed to wear clothes in which I am comfortable with regardless of the fact whether they are too short or covered,

I dreamed to be an artist without anybody enquiring me about which degree I possess or what my qualification is,

I dreamed to inhale pure, fresh air which is not full of pollution for once,

I dream to see poverty free India where not at every turn there was someone standing in the scorching heat of sun begging for few rupees,

I wanted to get educated not because it was my need but to match the inane standards of this cruel society,

I wanted to speak English regardless of this fact whether it is my native language or not,

So that nobody can point a finger at me saying I don’t belong here,

But there is a thin line between what I wanted and what I dreamed for,

As living in a brothel is not something which is appreciated and it is not easy to live a life in this hell hole,

For every need and dream here you have to pay a price which now I am not willing to give,

All these men out there don’t see me as a women who has feelings and soul,

But they see me as a women who has vagina and bosom,

They know how to use my body for their own privilege and to quench their own thirst,

But they don’t know how to worship, cherish or respect me.

I dreamed of living in a place where people are not as narrow-minded as they are,

A place where every person respected a job of prostitute,

I dreamed of getting the kind of respect a normal being has,

I dreamed of getting support from my family for what I do,

I dreamed of being a mother, bestowing all the love I have on my child,

But thinking about all this makes me even more numb to every emotion,

Knowing how the mentality of this society is and how this society functions,

Knowing they will not be able to digest a prostitute upbringing a child,

As I am anything but a human being, like I am shallow from inside,

I don’t have a character as I use my body to make my ends meet which according to them is a draconian act,

Living a life as a prostitute is a shame and brings disgrace to this society,

But before ending this right here,

I want to ask questions whose answers I am not cognizant of and for my survival I need to know them,

Why women have to endure every pain?

Why women have to be perfect and expected to be like Sita?

Why women can’t be as ferocious as a lion is?

Why raping a women does not bring disgrace for a man?

Why he is not ashamed of his own actions?

Why he gets away with every crime which is done against women?

Why???